Tuesday, January 29.2019

  Music:   Maya – Banco de Gaia (on Maya, 2011)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. The Defense Attorney

2:37am -
Omg I’ve been up since Sunday. I literally haven’t slept since Saturday night… Was up all night Sunday night working on a faux fur bikini for an upcoming shoot and then had to leave for jury duty downtown on Monday morning at 6:30am… Then did a print layout for a magazine ad tonight (Monday night) and now finishing my bikini.

So, quick update since I haven’t written in here in a spell... Holy fuck me, ONE MONTH EXACTLY. WTH... But I kinda shifted into Mad Scientist mode so that I could pull focus, and large desktop (27” monitors) site design is DOOOONNNEEEE!!! Like completely. Now plugging in all the content and then doing design tweaks for small desktop, tablet, and phone versions!!

Oh, and jury duty was rad, for everyone who’s ever gotten their notice and just thrown it away or written in for the excusal… It’s actually pretty cool. I got into a debate argument with one of the defense attorneys XD It was hot because neither of us wanted to back down… Then he kinda kept shooting questions and sidelong glances back to me afterward. Probably a combo of the tête-à-tête and the black pleated miniskirt and knee-high lace-up boots I chose to wear…

It’s just not a Jenna-dventure if I can’t cause trouble… <3

So yeah, site is barreling toward launch, along with 3 others that I’m launching simultaneously (I think I may have forgotten to mention those… *giggles mischievously*) For now, I’m gonna finish this bikini and then go be unconscious for awhile.

Saturday, December 29.2018

  Music:   In the Night – Nim Vind (on The Fashion of Fear, 2008)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. The Raft

10:23pm -
You guys, holy fuck my ass!!! FIGURE OF SPEECH, BOYS, no one’s doing anything to my ass right now… *eyes you all suspiciously*

Okay. SO.

In the continuing adventures of Site Automation and embolstered by my recent javascript get-date victory, I got to thinking… What other sorts of things can I implement in order to streamline my updates? So, I decided to teach myself how to use SQL databases and call the data via PHP codes.

I was a little intimidated about dipping my toes into this lake, because you know… The water’s just murky enough that you can’t quite see the bottom, and there’s one of those Creepshow 2 black tar blobs floating about in the middle…

But I decided, well… There may be a bit of a learning curve, but it’s going to save sooooo much time in the long run. For those who don’t know about SQL/PHP, basically like… Site updates are data and the SQL database can store those updates. So, rather than posting “January 17th – Updated my Girlfriends Gallery!!” on the actual webpage, I could add that text as an entry in the SQL database, and it would propagate to the site via PHP code.

*feeling your boners deflating like one of those wiener dog balloons*

And it’s ridiculously helpful since the site basically has 4 different versions: large desktop, small desktop, tablet, and phone. So, rather than manually entering the same update 4 times via HTML, I can just update the database once and it goes out to all 4 versions of the site.

This style of coding is a little more advanced, but I was like fuck it… I’ll take time out and invest the – how long would it realistically take me to learn something like this? – two days?

So, I actually ended up figuring out the basics in like an hour, and I wrote my first piece of code tonight WHICH ACTUALLY WORKED ON THE FIRST TRY!!!!! OMG. So, I’m quite pleased with myself right now and I wanted to share it with you guys.

It’s for my Latest News & Updates section, where I’m gonna be posting stuff like I mentioned above, like when I update my galleries, journal, news, appearances, interviews, etc! It's gonna be pulling all of my updates, with the newest one always being displayed at the top!

So, I wrote it like this:
(Where SQL SERVER, USERNAME, PASSWORD, & DATABASE are replaced with all my server login info)

$con=mysqli_connect("SQL SERVER","USERNAME","PASSWORD","DATABASE");
// Check connection
if (mysqli_connect_errno())
    echo "Failed to connect to MySQL: " . mysqli_connect_error();
$sql = "SELECT * FROM `Latest Updates Main Page` ORDER BY `ID` DESC";
$result = $con->query($sql);
if ($result->num_rows > 0) 
// output data of each row
while($row = $result->fetch_assoc()) 
<div class="planet-jenna-main-updates">
<span class="planet-jenna-main-updates-date"><?php echo $row["Date"]; ?></span>  <?php echo $row["Description"]; ?>
    } else 
echo "error";

If any of you guys do coding for a living, you’re probably like OMG that’s adorable. XD But – for my first try – I am SOOOOOOO excited!!! And it WORKED!!! And I actually understand WHY it works, which is the rad part!!

OMG so excited!! So yah, this is the sort of thing I do on a Saturday night. Maybe I’ll start going to Mensa meetings with Asia Carrera…

OMG, okay, I’m gonna go see what other sorts of databases I can make!! If any of you guys are into this and wanna talk about code or maybe help me learn more advanced ways to do stuff, you can email me at jenna@planetjenna.com!

I love you all over your faces!!

Tuesday, December 25.2018

  Music:   Hold – Gravity Kills (on Gravity Kills, 1996)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. THE FEELS

11:39pm -
YOU GUYS!!! WTF… Omg I’ve gotten sooooo much site traffic these past 2 days, and I totally wasn’t expecting ANY because of the holidays… And maybe it’s not even a big deal, but it is to me and it means SO MUCH that you guys took time out of your busy holiday schedules to come pop in to see your fiery little kitten!! I didn’t have any sort of holiday goodies planned because I literally expected like NO interest in things until I actually launched the site, but you all proved me so deliciously wrong… And trust me, I have TONS of sexy, fun holiday ideas already planned for 2019!!!  ♥ ♥ ♥

So, here’s a little treat that I totally threw together super quickly with – hilariously enough – something that I just randomly had in my closet XD


You have no idea… And I know I keep saying this, but the site is just getting more and more unreal, the closer things get to launch!! I hope you all had INCREDIBLE holidays and got everything you wanted, plus more!!!

XXX x 10000000000000,
Friday, December 21.2018

  Music:   Shame – Stabbing Westward (on Whither Blister Burn + Peel, 1996)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Psychosexual Entanglement

5:49pm -
LMAO this is like boys talking to me XD

In the same vein, this video is everything:

Omgggggggg SO sexy

“I DISAGREED with ‘the treatment’, Julie…” *puuuuuuuuuuuurrs*

Tuesday, December 18.2018

  Music:   Fetisha – Orgy (on Candyass, 1998)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Frozen Pole

10:37pm -
I finally got a chance to set up Pazuzu last night and he is teh litur4l h0t sex0rz omg. Apparently, you guys think so, too, because his picture that I posted in here the other night has more downloads than my House of Jenna cam grab, what in the actual fuck… XD I would be jealous, but I know… He IS tastyAF.

Speaking of… House of Jenna, holy fuck me… OH! I don’t think I actually mentioned this, but that’s what I’m calling the webcam section: House of Jenna. Sounds like something that should be on Cinemax at 3am, right?

*slides forward onto edge of chair... comes up onto toes*

So, I’ve been getting them all set up and I am IN LOVE with these cams, you guys… You don’t even KNOW. I literally wanna stream nonstop… I still need to look into the logistics of this, like there are a few different live stream softwares that I can use, and I know my webhost has streaming capabilities, too. At first, I wasn’t sure how I would feel about doing live cams, and I wasn’t even planning to have them on the site at all… But guys kept asking about it, so I was like fuck, why not? I thought maybe I would be kinda nervous, having them on me all the time, but OMG I f’n LOOOOOVVVEEEE it. I imagine it will be that much more exciting when real live boys are actually watching them... I guess those exhibitionistic proclivities run a little bit deeper than I originally thought.

*sees moth flitter into room… pounces... watches moth flutter away… licks paw*

So, I got jennacam04 all set up tonight, which is gonna be the mobile cam, like for closeups and when I’m out and about making mischief. This is more of a casual grab, without all the makeups and – y’know – WEARING CLOTHES. Which, by the way, I’m only wearing so much because it’s FREEZING right now. All you northern boys would laugh at me; it’s 56degrees outside... But I’m a tropical girl, I don’t understand temperatures below 70!! And, besides, tongues stick to poles when it gets too cold, you know how it is…

So, here’s the cam set-up I’m thinking about doing to start:

Jennacam01 is gonna be in the garage studio, where I have my screenprinting rigs, so you guys can watch me print things for the shoppe and see all the new gear before it’s posted, and maybe we can do merch giveaways and stuff like that!

Jennacam02 is gonna be in the dining room because I have – anyone? Anyone? – ANOTHER STUDIO set up in there. It’s got my sewing machines, fabrics, jewelry stuffs and I also use that space for photoshoots.

And Jennacam03 is gonna be the wide-angle view of my whole bedroom.

OMG SO EXCITED!!! I’m thinking on ideas for the kinda shows I wanna do… They’ve gotta be, like, different from other things that are already out there and super creative and – most importantly – FUN!! I already have a couple of ideas that I think are gonna be so rad!!

And omg I’ve been listening to this album like nonstop lately, I don’t know why I’m totally obsessed with it all of a sudden…

OH! And I finished my painting!! Is gonna be the main banner for the Artwork section, so you’ll get to see the whole thing when the site launches!

I has snek and French Manicure:

I was going for a vibe like… You know those old-timey circus posters? Like the ones with the bizarre paintings for the Sideshow acts? That’s the style I was going for with this and I’m SOOOOOOO happy with how it turned out! I think I full-on nailed it, so excited to see what you guys think!!

My next drawing I wanna do has more of a traditional tattoo flash kinda vibe.

OMGGGGZZZZ okay, I'm gonna go get something to eat and then back to web coding into the night! I’m building the Members Section and also one of the hot boys at Whole Foods told me about this movie he thinks I should watch, called My Daddy’s Mistress. So, I gotta see what that’s all about!! <3 I love you guys so much!!

Friday, December 14.2018

  Music:   Peripherics – AES Dana (on Season 5, 2003)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Pink Love Jelly

3:57am -
Omg the energy outside is everything right now. There are storms moving in… Tropical winds whipping around cooler air from foreign shores; their chemistry is intoxicating.

*eyes flash… whiskers twitch… whips tail back and forth*

So, I’ve just unboxed this hot little fellow. He is… *bites lip… arches back* I’ve named him Pazuzu.

I was on Internet Archive last night, scoping out modeling and cam sites from the late 90’s/early 2000’s, reading their journals, and wondering what they’re all doing now – almost 20years later. It was surreal, reading someone’s diary from 20years ago, like… That window into their lives, like looking into an Oracle pool, watching the events of the past unfold with the current flow of reality dancing across my rapt, attentive flesh…

Just like pages in a book, Danny…

One of the girls posted this in her journal on Tuesday, January 09, 2001 at 1:08am:

(copied verbatim, she didn't want to go to work the next day)

“*whine* no work! just sit at home and be dorky! more people should sign up for my site, so i can sit at home and be a g00ber and work on the site and do shows and have fun going on all the time. *sigh* i can dream, can't i?”

And, much like the strange coolness stirring about on the air right now, that statement… That desire… Tickled its way over a keen sense of gratitude that I’ve been feeling lately… As Planet Jenna’s launch speeds closer and closer, I’ve found myself intrinsically aware of just how BLESSED I am, being able to live my dreams and pursue my fantasies uninhibited. Don’t get me wrong: your intrepid little kitten WORKS HER TANNED AEROBICIZED ASS OFF. The 7month span between February and August watched through that same Oracle with its own sense of spellbound fascination as I worked 19hours per day, 7days a week, relentlessly laying the foundations for the eventual subject of my Forbes article, which will undoubtedly make mention of the curiously recurrent connections between Planet Jenna and Space-X.

But, I’ve been acutely aware, these past few weeks, that not everyone gets this sort of opportunity to follow their passions in such an unencumbered way, and – for that – I am grateful every single moment that writhes against my body. Planet Jenna was formed from a simple idea and – as I’m sure a lot of you are wondering – made possible by a very generous grant from the Daddy Warbucks Foundation, because – for whatever reason – he can actually see the potential in everything that I have roiling around in my head. I’ve stopped thanking him because, apparently, it grew so incessant, he would just roll his eyes good-naturedly and say “I KNOW. You don’t have to keep telling me.”

I even offered to get a proper job in the meantime, as things take off; they asked if I wanted a position at the tanning salon, but my dad told me not to do it… So, I’ve just been feeling a very similar sensation to being doused in that pink love jelly from Ghostbusters 2 lately… And I’m so excited to launch everything and omggggg the ideas I have and my clothing line is gonna be… You guys are just gonna lose your minds!!!

And this little deuchebag is snoring so loudly, it sounds like there’s a human boy in my room with me.

I’m being so scattered right now. This one hot boy called me erratic the other day, and I thought he was calling me erotic. Either way, I mean… They both fit your fiery little kitten like a black vinyl catsuit, so….

Wednesday, December 12.2018

  Music:   The Nile's Edge – VAST (on Visual Audio Sensory Theater, 1998)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Push-Up Bra

10:18pm -
Working on site automation. I’m looking to make things as streamlined as possible, in terms of dynamic updating… I realized last night that I can’t look at the site as one solid object, rather it’s an exquisite piece of machinery, made up of several equally exquisite moving parts, each with their own intricacies, needs, and desires.

*slides forward on chair.. straps of my top slip down around shoulders*

So, I crawled into bed around 3:30am this morning, pulled out my notebook with the little fuzzy kittens on the front, tugged thoughtfully at my striped knee socks, and made a list of all my site pages, organized by their update frequency.

*Feeling the disappointment from those boys who came here just to see me naked*

“GOD, she just always wants to say stuff!!”

It’s like talking too loudly while your souffle is rising, you know how it is…

Just eat your corndog, Tera!

I did some poking around and spliced together this tasty little piece of code that automatically updates the date every Monday, for my Featured Piccie of the Week page. Like, each week, it’s gonna say “Featured Piccie For the Week of:” and then have the date. Which isn’t a HUGE deal to just manually update, but having it change automatically is so cool.

For the boys who SUPER vibe on the geek frequency with me (Hay Girl, that dress would look even better accelerating towards my bedroom floor at 9.8ms²) here’s how I wrote it:

<p id="currentweek"></p>
var monthname=new Array('January','February','March','April',
var day = new Date();
while (day.getDay() != 1) day = new Date(day.valueOf()-86400000);
var suffix;
switch (day.getDate() % 10) {
case 1 : suffix = 'st';
case 2 : suffix = 'nd';
case 3 : suffix = 'rd';
default : suffix = 'th';
document.getElementById("currentweek").innerHTML = monthname[day.getMonth()] + ' '  + day.getDate() + suffix + ' ' + day.getFullYear();

Where day.getDay() != 1 calls the day of the week, like Sunday = 0, Monday = 1, etc… And 86400000 is how many milliseconds there are in an Earth day.

I’m also building a php query right meow to pull a little description text for each Featured Piccie from a SQL database.

I figure, if the Sexkitten CEO, Physicist, or Tattoo Artist things don’t pan out, I can fall back on a Development position at Microsoft. …or get a job at Hooters. Either way… I think they both involve a push-up bra and free Seahawks tickets.

OOOOH!! AND!! I have this sexy little fellow being delivered tomorrow!!

*bounces up and down… climbs into your lap.. bites you*

Is 2-in-1 touchscreen laptop with upgradable memory to 32gb *puuuuuuuuuurrs* So I can work on stuff and stream the cams, even when I’m out and about making mischief!

Omg so much fun stuff going on!! And here, I’ve tortured you boys enough with all of the blah blah blah, Jenna… Blah blah blah:

Tuesday, December 11.2018

  Music:   Dig – Mudvayne (on LD50, 2000)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Moral Imperative

8:24pm -
– Sneak peek at the banner for the Artwork section of the site:

For the new initiates: yes, I drew that with my own hot little paws. Tattoo Artist is standing next to Quantum Physicist on my list of career choices, right behind Sexkitten CEO.

But honestly, I don’t even know why I bother. There was what? NO ONE at the mutant hamster races, I only had ONE entry into the Madame Curie look-alike contest, and he was disqualified later…

Soooooo… Finishing the banner tonight, photoshoot tomorrow, and I’ve got sexy little treats for Emailing List and JennaMobile subscribers later this week! Much like chocolate cherries and the commingling of clenched muscles and quickening breath that accompany accidentally cutting yourself while you’re shaving, they are equal in their decadence but entirely different animals, so make sure you’re dialed in to both!!

If you haven’t already, you can text LOVEJENNA to 727.230.2533 to join JennaMobile and you can join my Emailing List here!

Monday, November 26.2018

  Music:   Monster in Me – Orgy (on Talk Sick, 2015)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the 80's Horror Film

10:37pm -
ZOMG site is looking SO FIREAF!! You guys are gonna flip. I love coding, but… Actually, no… That’s not true. I love web DESIGN. Web coding is… You know that scene in Poltergeist where the guy is eating a chicken leg and then starts digging all the flesh off his face?

Web design comes naturally to me because it’s like art; you know, playing around with graphics and putting them together with the texts and piccies in Photoshop… But getting those graphics to go together on an actual webpage and look good on all devices is… You know that scene in Poltergeist 2 where the dad vomits up a demonic tequila worm?

I mean, I love figuring out how to do it and being able to say that I built my site all by myself, but GOD… I am soooooo excited to just take my clothes off and take pictures. XD

Monday, October 29.2018

  Music:   Adrenalize – In This Moment (on Blood, 2012)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the Hot Fudge Sundae

2:12am -
“It’s getting Jenna to sit down and focus, that’s the challenging part…”

Sometimes I imagine that my psychosis has grown so intense that all of this – gestures broadly at everything – is a total delusion. That – as I’m going about my daily activities in my perceived reality - I’m actually just a raving mad kitten, perched in the corner of a padded room, my posture affording a glimpse of my panties beneath the oversized long-sleeved tee slipping down around my shoulders with those trademark tangled locks of shimmery, multi-hued blonde hair.

Doctors observing from afar because no one really likes to discuss the… incident… that occurred the last time one of them got too close, and – I mean – they don’t actively acknowledge that as the cause of their distance, but it’s… an unspoken understanding.

“She’s an intoxicating fantasy but a devastating reality…” One of them scribbles in the margin of their notebook.

Hannibal Lector, Randle McMurphy, Harley Quinn, Lisa Rowe… I keep sexy company.

*eyes flash… whiskers twitch*

So, I’m unofficially announcing an official launch date of January 01st.

This is completely tentative and totally subject to change, but I am going to strive for this with the fury of a thousand burning suns because I am IN LOVE with the idea of launching everything when my baby boo, Sirial, is at his zenith in the night sky.

Also, it would make things sooooo much easier from a corporate perspective, accounting and such, because my fiscal year runs from January through December. So, it works on a variety of levels.

*slides tongue to the roof of my mouth… makes little clicking noise*

I just randomly woke up at like 5:23am the other morning with something whispering that idea into my ear. “You know, January 01st would be a good day,” It said casually, twisting a lock of my aforementioned shimmery hair around its finger. “What with Sirial being directly overhead and all…”

At the time, I simply rolled over, slid a long, tanned leg from underneath the sheets, mumbled an incoherent jumble of what we’re all agreeing to transcribe as, “Mmmhmmm, pogo stick turtle chalkboard candy cane” and passed back out. It wasn’t until later in the day that I was struck with that sudden recollection of dreamtime consciousness that the idea elicited a far more enthusiastic response, alongside clenched muscles and moistened lips.

And, I mean, I’m starting to feel as though I NEED something of this nature; a little wooden cutout rabbit with a target painted in the middle, racing across the track in front of me, to force my finger back against the trigger, you know? Because I could totally foresee the perfectionist in me adding day after day to its body count for the next year. “I’m so close…” Whimpered breathlessly, “I’m almost there…”

“Do you have any perfectionist in you? …Want some?” I purr, giggling mischievously at the young doctor jotting down notes on his clipboard.

He chuckles despite himself and looks up at me over his glasses. I slide gracefully off my perch on the edge of the cool steel table and slink towards him on my hands and knees. He clears his throat and nervously looks away.

Because, I mean… I have so many ideas for Planet Jenna, I’m already 3 years down the road with everything and planning my eventual buy-out of Amazon. But, speaking of my corporate role model, you have to lay your foundations before you can start building your empire skyward. Your fiery little kitten’s foundations just have a few less books and a few more scantily-clad pictorials. There will be plenty of stories and writings, too, though... And I know all you boys just come here to read the articles, anyway.

Sunday, October 14.2018

  Music:   Sanctified – Nine Inch Nails (on Pretty Hate Machine, 1989)
  Mood:   Jenna vs. the God Complex

4:32am -
I'm still not 100% sure what I’m doing… I think, a tangled lock of sun-streaked blonde hair falling into my face as I tug at the black fishnet. I mean… I’m sure it will turn out sexy, but… I purse my bubblegum pink lips into a pout and furrow my brow, sliding forward onto the chair and spreading my legs a bit. My muscles tense and I stretch, massaging some of the tightness out of my shoulders.

"Black fishnet and tiger’s eye against sun-drenched skin; hints of salt lingering on the tongue with milky coconut."

I stare at the deconstructed snarl of knotted thread, wondering if I’ll ever actually turn my fleeting, perfect vision into reality. I feel like similar thoughts probably danced about in the uncertainty of divine stellar chaos during the creation of the universe…

“God Complex, huh? You’re gonna make one sexy cult leader, Crazy Cakes.”

I shift my gaze from a shimmering pile of vibrantly-colored fire glass.

Your grill is engulfing your whole head there, Stick Man. *rolls eyes* Besides, that’s a Messiah Complex. Cult leaders wanna be worshipped… I just wanna create. *snaps fingers* Let them build their pantheon of idols; I have alchemy to perform.

*whiskers twitch… slinks into kitchen to make a coffee*

Coffee - Jenna-Style:
(Not to be confused with Rodeo Sex: your dick should not burst forth from your pants at any point during this process)

  16oz. Spanish Roast Coffee
  2tbsp Dark Amber Honey
  2tbsp Raspberry Syrup
  Splash of Almond Milk
  4oz. Almond Cream

All Organic. Vegan. Standard. *licks cream from paw*

I pad back into my bedroom and sit down on the floor, sliding a chest full of baubles and gemstones in between my legs. I open the creaky lid and peer inside, my eyes dancing across a glimmering array of foreign treasure.

"They’re gonna worship you anyway, you know."

"...I know." I murmur distractedly, a small bronze crescent Yesod unleashing a torrent of black-netted inspiration.

And it was there, amidst blood red garnet chips bathed in the milky glow of moonlight, palm fronds picking up in a quickening wind thick with sea air and exotic perfumes, that I realized… I’d never heard THAT voice before.

Monday, October 08.2018

  Music:   Zombie Eaters – Faith No More (on The Real Thing, 1989)
  Mood:   Surf Kitten

12:49am -
Feel like this should be in an ad in Surfer magazine...

“Jenna only dates boys who wear Rip Curl”

Tuesday, October 02.2018

  Music:   Spells – Orgy (on Talk Sick, 2015)
  Mood:   Feral little wildcat

8:58pm -
I have a set of 3 jeweled navel rings, a wolf’s tail, and a camera lens being delivered tomorrow. These are the moments when I get these little flashes of well, Jenna, you must be doing something right…

Faux fur wolf’s tail, standard. *snaps fingers*

And actual navel RINGS, not barbells! How 1996 is that?? So f’n pumped I actually found a place that sells them! I think they’re predominantly for like, eyebrows or noses or some sort of facial accoutrement, but this renegade kitten is going to slip that cool stainless steel through her belly button, click the little jewel-encrusted metal orb into place, and run around listening to Spice Girls. *nods. licks paw*

Speaking of the 90’s, that band Orgy put out a new album a few years ago that I literally just found out about like last week, and holy fuck me… It is ruling my life.

  Orgy – Talk Sick  

I don’t think it’s all the original members, and it’s like a total sellout club album that kinda reminds me of Ghost Town, so I can see why people didn’t like it (I guess it got a lot of bad reviews). But OMF it is so fun and hot and I love it so hard.

One of the lyrics on Come Back is “Bitch, lay your head down; shut up and relax a while…”


I need a sexy boy to say that to me while he pushes me down onto the bed, corporate ledgers, shoppe receipts, and several swatches of neon-colored vinyl spilling all over the floor, and then pleasures me from head to toe.

*eyes twinkle mischievously at the thought… licks corner of lip and catches tongue between canines*

It’s just that… Your intrepid little kitten works herself so hard… *tenses.. cracks neck… digs claws into the ground* I mean, I WOULD put up a fight at being forced into submission, but… The right boy would know how to handle that.

So. YouFit is literally everything. OMG I’m so f’n excited!! I went in and made my membership on Sunday and I did my first workout yesterday afternoon - AFTER raging like a feral little wildcat on the trails all morning and flying off my bike BACKWARDS on a steep incline… The dirt was all torn up in one particular spot halfway up the hill and I hit it HARD, so my front tire came to an abrupt, unexpected stop; however, your fearless gear kitten DID NOT stop, rather the scientific principles of the universe saw fit to jettison her tight little bottom from the seat (in what I can only assume was the most graceful of manners) while she was still firmly gripping the handlebars…

But I will say: I noticed a few of the boys at the gym staring at me while I was on the Leg Press machine, so I’m thinking maybe my shorts were a bit too short…

“Rethinking that Planet Fitness dress code, Crazy Cakes?”




…Your glasses are stuck in reverse there, Stick Man. *rolls eyes*

So, just in case, I ordered a bunch of sexy… they’re not really yoga pants; I refuse to wear those due to the influx of soccer moms who wear them to shop, pick up pizzas, and drink white wine, but never actually WORK OUT in them… But the ones I ordered aren’t really sweat pants, either. They’re more form-fitting than that… They’re like tight, sexy hip-hugger sweat pants, I guess you would call them.

So, I’m thinkkkkinnnng… sexy black hip huggers, matching sports bra… bicep curls with the 45’s, muscles taut, lock of hair falling down around tanned, freckled shoulders... little grunts escaping my glossy, bubblegum pink lips with each successive rep…

*eyes flash… flicks tail*

So, tomorrow is a day full of Planet Jenna corporate mischief; meetings, errands, deposits, and then I have an appointment with one of the personal trainers at the gym later in the evening. I’m gonna try not to work him TOO hard… 😉

Tonight is: organic coffees with honey, raspberry syrups, and almond cream *whiskers twitch* and, also, I decided to do the fishnet bikinis in white and crimson in addition to black, so I’m gonna start on those!

OH! And I’ll be posting more preview piccies later this week, because I know you boys are getting antsy. I LOOOOOVEEE YOOOUSSS ALL OVER YOUR FACES!!!

*waits for the one who’s gonna reply “I wanna love you all over YOUR face, Jenna…”*